Saturday, January 24, 2009

Smell of Rose

What are the most memorable moments of your life? When you felt peace, when you felt that in that very moment the world was exactly as it should be, when you felt that you are at the right place at the right moment, when you almost felt that you understand existence, when everything was just all right. If you seriously count them there are not so many, are there..? You have lived twenty, forty, sixty years, and there have been only a handful really
 penetrating moments, have been not..? Perhaps, when you watched 
a colorful sunset, and the beautiful play of lights on deep orange clouds left you speechless; Or perhaps, on a mild
afternoon, when you smelled a rose, sitting on a soft garden grass. The gentle wind touched your skin, and the sweetness of the rose was unspeakable; Or perhaps, when you watched your lover sleeping in your arms. You sensed her/his unmistakable smell, that meant you the pure love that moment. The warmness of her/his body, the soft rising and falling of her/his chest, and the small movements of her/his eyelids told you: the world is perfect, after all; Or perhaps, when you sat that afternoon at the dining table, and around the table you saw your children, maybe the grandchildren as well. You looked that special spark in their eyes that only children have. Listened the warm tinkling of their joyful laugh. Then you knew that life worth it. You knew it for sure.

Was this experience really bound to that special subject -t
he sunset, the rose, the lover, the child- you contemplated? Or your amazement of sunset, your pure love to your lover and to your child opened up some deep blockage, and let you experience the life in its eternity and entirety; and beyond even that, maybe for a split second the pure existence itself. Think about it 
for some time. In that very moment were you aware that you are watching the sunset; In that culminating point when you held your lover and felt the perfect happiness and tranquility, were 
you really conscious about the pleasure of owning and being owned? I am not asking one second before, or after - I am asking exactly that fleeting moment, when you were content. All your worries and hopes, your image of self, were all these present in that very moment, or there was no subject and no object, s/he and me, before and after, only the experience that melt all separation into the sensation of very existence here and now. When the sunset were you and you were the sunset; when that very spark in the eyes of your beloved one was you and you were the spark. Then you were utterly tranquil and content as your self opened up and united with that incontrollable flow of Universe, without a second thought.

That very moment is the beginning of meditation. Here in the dhamma-hall we all are practicing that very moment. We force our mind to detach from its created realm, by focusing our awareness to the subject of meditation. This links us back to what is 
real and true. In everyday life it happens when something really spectacular happens, because we are so deeply buried into our age-old habitual patterns, that we need so
mething extraordinary to grab our consciousness out from the cage of that world it has been 
creating to itself. Here
 in dhamma-hall the breathing makes it. In and out - no thought - in and out - no worries - in and out - just peace - in and out - and clarity.

There is this spark in every one of us. But we bury it, and, after a decade or two, it becomes barely perceivable. We bury it under unbearable weights of heavy
 thoughts, fears, unimportant dreams. We become so attached to them, that
 we forget the spark that actually lights everything, yet, lays out of anything. We start to live on the very surface of our minds, where all the trash is accumulated. We jump from one fear to the next, then to the next hope. Endlessly. All in our lives after a certain age we are in keep running. From one to another, another, then another again. Then we become frightened; we do not see the spark anymore, we do not find meaning anymore. But we do not stop, instead we double the force with which we gather more this and more that. Then we die.

Here we do not want that endless circle. Therefore we unite with the Universe trough our breathing. Just as you united trough the sunset, through the rose, through your lover, through your child, through what and whoever that opened a window for that moment to the truth. When the mind calms down, when there is no distraction anymore, when there is no hope and fear, when the subject and the object melt into one, then even the breathing, the final aid fades away. What is left behind, where there is no thought, no emotion, where no object and no 'I' and no sensation is present? That is for you to find out - That is who you really are...


Catvibe said...

Extremely well articulated, excellent!

Fida said...

Again, brilliant. How was it for you coming out "into the world" after one month of meditation? Are you living in complete balance? I struggle a bit 'between the worlds', you know, the inside and the outside - the private me and everything else.

DMartini said...

Oh, thanks a lot for both of you!

Well, coming out... I feel balanced, yes, more than ever, but at the same time very much detached. Most of my old habits and aims seem meaningless now. So, I am about to reconsider my whole life according to what Ive understood there. What is the most painful to see how distracted people are; so much that it often even hurts...

Btw, about a year ago I also attended a 10 days retreat in Goenka's style :)

R. Ramesh said...

dan, thanks for passing by global-madrasi blog stay connected..cheers..

- A - C - said...

Hello Daniel :-)
I am bestowing upon you The Lemonade Award. Please come to my site to pick up your award.

Catvibe said...

Daniel there is an award for you on my blog. ;-) For your inspiring posts and your seeking spirit.

Bhaskar said...

That is one of the most insightful and original thought i read about meditation.

Fida said...

Hope all is well! I wish you a marvelous 2010!